There are lots of reasons as to why we connect with other people  -  I hope some of those reasons would include:

1. Likeminded – birds of a feather and all that
2. Not likeminded – hearing the other side of the story is always good
3. You are in a position to enable the individual
4. There is a mutual benefit between the two of you – a win win situation
5. You’re a student – you want to learn
6. They’re cute… what? Don’t tell me this doesn’t factor in

When we connect with other people – a few things can happen:

1. It’s completely one-sided, or your professional advances go unacknowledged – it happens… get over it.
2. Reciprocity – everyone is winning.
3. You are learning a ridiculous amount from the opposing team
4. You are stunned to learn how bloody annoying or juvenile that person actually is.

Before you purge a connection for whatever reason, take a minute to consider:

1. Baby and bath water. Sometimes overlooking the less favourable characteristics isn’t such a bad thing.
2. The old saying about if you really want to know someone, move in with them… this space is close and personal. A lot of good people are just that, good – not perfect. There are times when embracing the flaws is more noble, even smarter, than not.
3. The person is connected to other people who probably need to know who you are. After all sometimes it really is not what you know… but who!

I’m finding so much value by doing a few simple things:

• Cut people in this space a bit of slack.
• Be slower to judge.
• Recognize that overlooking a flaw does not equal you being a door mat.

Networking is an art – one on par to drawing stick man and gluing glitter –  but an art all the same that uses a basic formula. It also happens to be one of two most valuable and must have skills you need in work and life.

If there is one thing I know, it is networking. Connecting with great minds and not so great, is what I do. Networking really is an art. Perfecting it however, is easy. Using it is ridiculously powerful.

I have to admit, I am absolutely floored by people who ask me why they should network, or suggest they’re not really sure it’s worth their time and effort. My inside voice screams: Are you fugging kidding me? My outside voice asks: Really, why do you think that? Their answers are valid. They simply do not understand the value of networking.

What is networking?

Connecting with another individual through the exchange of basic information with the intention to find a mutually beneficial opportunity

How do you network exactly?

It starts with your attitude. Successful people absolutely get that you must first give before you receive. Always be:

• The first to smile.
• The first to extend a handshake.
• The first to start the conversation with a question about the other person.
• The first to dismiss a negative reception. It happens… but it’s their problem, not yours.

What’s the networking formula?

It’s definitely more of a formula than a natural born ability.  It is not rocket science. It does need practice.  Here’s the magic:

1. Who are you?
2. What are your prepared to share?
3. What do you need?

The who are you question: answer it in 30 seconds. This means you will need a paper and pen, a few scribbled sentences and finally a rehearsed 30 second answer preferably vetted by a close friend.

What are you prepared to share question: This is hardly ever money. This could be introductions to people in your network within a specific industry. Excess of some product or service you can share, information sharing, or an hour of your time to bounce a few ideas around.

What do you need: Be specific. Consider you may be explaining a need to a room full of people who have no idea what your industry is about. Give them examples of job titles of people you’re looking to connect with, examples of companies, or buzz words. And regardless of whether you have an immediate need to fill for yourself, chances are you almost always know someone who needs to know someone you just met. Not so much? … Well, I’m willing to bet money that this person that is likely not an ideal fit for you on the surface, they probably know three people who all need to know you.

Networking works when there is a win win approach at the center of it all. It amazes me how so many people feel it’s ok to tap and pillage their network several times over. It’s definitely not ok. Nor will it get you near as far as a win win approach will.

The people in my network all share the same attitude, and when I introduce people to my network, I make a point of reinforcing the shared attitude. I go so far as to say, “I’m happy to introduce you to <PERSON> but please give some thought in advance as to what you can do for them.” It has to be balanced and mutually beneficial. Always.

I love connecting with likeminded people. If you feel so inclined, reach out and let me know who you are, what you’re prepared to share and what you need then let’s see where it goes.

To fully appreciate the value and opportunity networking affords, check out @MarkWSchaefer”s post on his learnings from Carnegie and how it they can make you a start at work!

Two very different things. We all know that text book knowledge is one thing… actual hands on work experience is another.

My point is this – Social Media and the world that it is needs to be played with, practised, fudged, screwed up, excelled at and train wrecked so you can learn what <not> to do.

Reading about it is great. Living it is necessary. 

Beware all you newbies to SM. Beware of those so called experts who are really newbies dressed up in lamb’s clothing. If your expert is suggesting you play in, utilize, leverage or act in this space ask to see some ID.

This reminds me of something Nana used to say: Don’t do what I do. Do what I say. – It didn’t work then and I can’t imagine it working now.

For a broad stroke visual of what Social Media is, find my post “What the Hell is Going on!”

For a kick ass workshop on SM – email me – I take requests!

When I grow up I want a fabulously large building, beautifully decorated, full of inspiration, brilliant minds that attracts fabulous people with a common vision – to change their world for the better.

Until that happens, I shall be spending more time here – www.socialinnovation.ca

For the record – I think we should all be agents of change. Lovve this concept.

Well sort of! www.socialnetworking-northamerica.com Takes place November 2009 in California! Let me know if you’re going to be there… I will be there with bells on!

Thanks Richard@sixdegs.com !

S.

What comes to mind when you hear the word – Networking? I have a very good friend who literally is the Queen of Networking. We were discussing the term earlier today and some interesting assessments were made… what do you think?

By the way, my good friend is Donna Messer – check out her clip here. http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=vQmVxLFtFn0